Ive been with my boyfriend for about a year, he lives 2 hours away and we see each other almost every weekend. I love him so much its ridiculous, but it may be undeserved. Our good times are great, no ones ever made me happier.. But our bad times are horrible, and no ones ever made me cry more. Through the course of our relationship hes been generally shady, Ive caught him talking to another girl who he promised he wouldnt talk to anymore because she was tryin to get with him, and I found tagged messages where he was flirting with another girl and set up a yahoo messenger convo so they could talk later (he swears they talked about me and she knew he was/is in a relationship, i dont believe that for a second).. Needless to say, Im insecure now.. We get into fights about the smallest things all the time because I just dont trust him much anymore. I got to the point recently where I couldnt take it anymore, I tried to break up with him. He convinced me to just take a break from the relationship because he didnt want to lose me, he was sorry for all the wrong he's done, and would try harder to make me happy and less insecure. I went with it because I really want things to be good again. We were talkin on the phone earlier and he was tellin me about his day, he said he texted me to tell me about something when he didnt, he had called me to tell me about it. I asked him if he had texted it to someone else, he said no and we moved on.. Later in the convo he said "why do I always gotta be textin someone else?" like i always accuse him of it.. I got defensive quick and started fussin about our past. He said he was just joking with me when he said it, because i guess we do joke like that, but it didnt feel like a joke when he said it. Either way, I dont think it was appropriate because of the situation... Was I wrong for gettin defensive? Please comment. I need advice and im sorry its long. =/
read comments (5)
you are RIGHT! (11) -
you are WRONG! (4)
November 9, 2009 at 10:13 pm by lime.coconut
in - Relationships#5 by Anonymous
I think you're wrong for just taking a break. There's obviously too many things wrong with your relationship, and it's not going to last.
I don't think you're wrong for not trusting him, but at the same time, texts can easily not be sent. Cellphones aren't perfect, and most services are actually crap.
Seriously, though, just end the relationship. It's not going to work.
#4 by Anonymous
OMG!!! I HAVE ALMOST THE SAME STORY.. ME AND MY MAN LIVE 2 HOURS APART AND I DROVE TO SEE HIM EVERY WEEND AND IT WAS GREAT BUT ALOT OF ARGUIN WE LASTED 9 MONTHS I COULDNT TAKE IT NO MORE... FIND SOMEONE LOCAL OR STAY ALONE
#3 by Anonymous
i think when you're in a relationship and you have to strictly tell someone that they can't talk to another person anymore...thats starting to make rules and there shouldnt be rules in a relationship. you should be able to trust him no matter what happens, even if you get hurt in the end. to me it sounds like your boyfriend is a real dud. I know you may love him and he may love you, but if he is talkin to other girls behind your back, he isn't worth all of the fights and tears. stand up for yourself girl! don't let him tie you down!
#2 by Anonymous
life is too short... if he is playing you or even think it... kick him ti the curve.
#1 by Anonymous
It's common to be insecure when you put your heart out there to be loved with the possibility of getting hurt. In this case, it hard to trust someone once things go wrong, but if you wanna work on things it takes two. You may have felt guilty for asking and he may have felt hurt with you constantly blaming him for messing around. Honestly, if you want it to work...forget about the past mistakes, remember the lessons and love one another. Pray about it:) I hope if you two are meant to be, that it will work itself out! -nisha
